Finding Fulfillment Where I Am

There have been many times in my life where I don’t seem to have any desires.  I’ve often mistaken this contentment for laziness or lack of direction.  We live in a society where we’re made to feel like we should always have goals to work toward.  If we’re not getting a promotion at work or trying to get to the next financial level then we’re made to feel bad about ourselves.

I do enjoy having a goal to work toward, but I have been asking myself lately, “what if I’ve already found what I’m looking for and don’t realize it?”  Alan Watts asked the question, “What is it that you want?”  When I ask myself this question, I have to honestly say, “I don’t know.”  Watts’ answer to this is that either I already have it or I don’t know myself.  This really resonates with me.

Four years ago I came to a realization that I don’t know anything.  I started to think, at 14 I thought I knew everything, then at 24 I thought I knew everything, but now, at 34 I don’t know anything.  I haven’t got the world or myself figured out.  At 38 I realize that I probably never will have that figured out.  So Alan Watts was right, I don’t know myself.  He went on to say that you can never really know yourself.

The funny thing is, I think both of his answer apply to me.  I think I already have what I want.  I have a wife who I love more than I ever imagined I could, three beautiful girls who I love, who make me happy and who I am incredibly proud of.  I have a home that I really like.  I couldn’t be happier with my career path.

I may not have things figured out but I seem to have what I want out of life.  So why struggle to obtain what I already have?

Be well. Be Positive.

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3 thoughts on “Finding Fulfillment Where I Am

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